Strong Does Not Mean Safe: Suicide Prevention in African Communities

September is Suicide Prevention Month, and we need to talk about suicide in African communities.

We are losing precious lives, yet suicide is still something many of us struggle to discuss openly. Any mention of wanting to die or end one's life should be taken seriously. It is not simply “attention-seeking.” It can signal that someone is experiencing profound distress and needs support.

Part of our silence is cultural.

My mother grew up in rural Nigeria, and within traditional Igbo culture, suicide carried enormous stigma. Historically, suicide could be viewed as an offence against the community and the land, with people who died by suicide sometimes denied customary burial on ancestral land and buried separately.

When something has historically been treated with that much shame, is it surprising that people might be afraid to talk about having suicidal thoughts?

We have to change that.

We also need to pay attention to the strong woman.

She may have spent her entire life holding everything together despite oppression and hardship. Everyone calls when they need her. She is hypervisible when others need help, yet somehow invisible when she is the one struggling.

And she may still be smiling.

She may be bubbly, successful, well-dressed, attending church, caring for everyone and overachieving. None of those things automatically mean that she is okay. Suicide does not have one appearance.

Warning signs can include talking about death or suicide, expressing hopelessness or feeling like a burden, withdrawing, dramatic changes in behaviour or mood, and other signs of serious emotional distress.

This is also where I challenge my fellow Christians.

Telling a suicidal person that they will go to hell is not suicide prevention. It adds condemnation to someone who may already be carrying unbearable pain.

Our faith should move us toward compassion. Jesus is not distant from human suffering. Scripture tells us that He understands our weaknesses and that God is close to the brokenhearted. A relationship with Christ should give us greater capacity to meet suffering with grace, love and mercy, not shame.

Sometimes extending empathy can save a life.

Ask people how they are really doing. If you are concerned, it is okay to ask directly, “Are you thinking about suicide?” Asking the question does not increase someone's risk of suicide. Listen without judgment and help them connect with a trusted psychotherapist, crisis support, or emergency care when necessary.

If you are in Canada and thinking about suicide, or worried about someone else, call or text 988 at any time. If there is immediate danger, call 911.

You are not alone, and your life is more precious than you may know.