Not All Siblings Are Rooting For You
- Mar 6
- 2 min read
Sibling rivalry is often treated like a joke.
Something from the Bible, Cain and Abel. Or reality television, the Kardashian sisters arguing over closets.
And sometimes we comfort ourselves by imagining siblings are supposed to be like Brandy and Ray J, loyal, protective, and publicly supportive.
But not all sibling dynamics look like that.
Sometimes the problem begins much earlier in the family system.
For example:
You open a new restaurant. Suddenly someone is anonymously leaving one star reviews.
You lose weight and start feeling confident. Now someone is sending old photos of what you looked like five years ago to the family WhatsApp group chat, just to “remind” everyone.
You move forward in life and somehow they are suddenly reconnecting with your former boss, estranged relatives, and anyone who ever had a grievance with you, even your sixth grade bully if she is available.
Sometimes the call is coming from inside the family.
A few signs of a deeply jealous sibling dynamic:
You may have grown up with a covertly psychopathic parent. These parents quietly thrive on rivalry, allowing sibling conflict to simmer rather than resolving it.
The fighting in childhood was not just normal sibling squabbles. It involved humiliation, alliances, and competition that never really ended.
Your early success triggered something emotional in them. Your achievements did not inspire them, they unsettled them.
Attempts to resolve things went nowhere. You tried to talk it out. They responded with silence, denial, or retaliation.
They remain deeply invested in your past. Because if they can keep you there, they do not have to deal with who you have become.
Sibling rivalry is not just a biblical story or a reality television trope.
If you have watched Nollywood’s Blood Sisters, you also know how quickly family dynamics can turn dark, even fatal.
Sometimes it is a quiet undercurrent that follows people into adulthood.
And sometimes the healthiest thing you can do is keep building anyway.
If you are seeking a new beginning and you need therapy, guidance, and life coaching, speak to me today about starting a New Chapter in your life!
Kevin
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